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Release date: 2022-12-06 04:28:53 Author:XLNHEFEC

I sighed. Less and less scares me, Richard. So when I find something that does bother me, I have to test it. I have to see if I can do it.

I sighed. Less and less scares me, Richard. So when I find something that does bother me, I have to test it. I have to see if I can do it.

He shook his head. This isn't courage, Anita, this is stubbornness.

Because it scares me, and I have to know if I can.

To me, Richard, I have something left to prove to me.

If I can crawl down into that hole.

I stared back into the hole and let myself acknowledge just how afraid I was. So afraid that I could taste something flat and metallic on my tongue. So afraid that my pulse was hammering in my throat, like a trapped thing. My voice came out calm, normal. I was glad. It doesn't matter that I'm afraid. I touched the flashlight, tried to pull it from his hand, but he held on. And, short of playing tug of war -- which I would probably lose -- I wasn't getting it away from him.

To me, Richard, I have something left to prove to me.

Give me the flashlight, Richard.

Give me the flashlight, Richard.

Then why do it?

Why? and the anger was more than a faint hint now.

If I can crawl down into that hole.

I shrugged. Maybe, but I still have to do it.

Why? He studied my face like he'd memorize it.

Why? He studied my face like he'd memorize it.

I shrugged. Maybe, but I still have to do it.

If I can crawl down into that hole.

He clutched the flashlight tighter. Why? And somehow I thought the question was about more than the oubliette and why I had to climb inside it.

Then why do it?

I looked at him, at the puzzlement in his face, his eyes, which had bled back to their normal, perfect brown. I'd been trying to explain shit like this to Richard for a few years now. I finally realized that he would never understand and I was tired of trying to explain myself, not just to Richard, to everybody.

I shook my head. I have to do it, Richard.

To me, Richard, I have something left to prove to me.

Give me the flashlight, Richard.

Why? and his voice held the first hint of anger, like a slap of warmth.

He clutched the flashlight tighter. Why? And somehow I thought the question was about more than the oubliette and why I had to climb inside it.

To me, Richard, I have something left to prove to me.

Why? He studied my face like he'd memorize it.

He held on with both hands. Why do you have to do this? Just tell me that. You're so scared your mouth is dry. I can taste it on your breath.

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